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It’s Good to Be Self-ish

Self-care is a radical practice that most of us push aside as we make room for serving others. We simply feel too busy taking care of the people around us to stop and take care of ourselves.

Myth of the Martyr

Being considered selfless is often it is a badge of honor that we have been led to strive for. Our society has taught us that we, as women, are the nurturers, and that our self worth is determined by how well we take care of the people around us at the expense of taking care of ourselves.

We are taught to feel guilty if we take care of ourselves.

We are called selfish.

In fact, we are prized and complimented for multitasking and doing it all.

Like Tom Sawyer and whitewashing the fence, we are tricked into believing that we, as women, are better equipped and superior to men because we can do it all. It is so engrained in our belief system that it’s quite radical to stop and challenge it.

I call bullshit on this old paradigm and refuse to live under this antiquated belief system any more.

My purpose in life is not to take care of everyone else at the expense of pushing my own needs aside. The best gift I can give to the people I love and the clients I serve is to take care of myself so I can come to them from a place of peace and joy.

And the way to do that is to take care of myself.



Without guilt or shame.


Here are 50 examples of ways that you can practice self-care. Right here, right now.

  1. Take a bubble bath
  2. Light candles
  3. Read a book
  4. Watch a movie
  5. Take a yoga class
  6. Go for a nature walk
  7. Call a dear friend for no reason
  8. Move your body
  9. Take a nap
  10. Pray/meditate
  11. Get a massage
  12. Get a mani/pedi
  13. Ask for help
  14. Cuddle with your dog
  15. Swim
  16. Wear your good perfume for no reason
  17. Get your hair done
  18. Write in your journal
  19. Paint
  20. Get down on the floor and play with your child
  21. Turn off your devices. Truly unplug for a while
  22. Schedule a mammogram/skin check/colonoscopy…
  23. Start a dream fund. All it takes is $5
  24. Say No to something that you don’t want to do.
  25. Drink lots of water with your favorite fresh fruit or herb. Try ginger for a zing.
  26. Let someone else cook dinner or order in.
  27. Watch the sunrise.
  28. Watch the sunset.
  29. Sit alone for 10 minutes and breathe.
  30. Throw away an item that is worn, broken or torn. Let go.
  31. Stretch.
  32. Sign up for a class to try something new.
  33. Scour your to-do list for items you can delegate, automate or eliminate. Then do it.
  34. Join a program, read a book, take a course to better your business and yourself.
  35. Have an orgasm.
  36. Slather on body lotion.
  37. Wear sunscreen
  38. Think of five things you are grateful for.
  39. Forgive someone.
  40. Forgive yourself.
  41. Listen to music.
  42. Dance.
  43. Read a magazine.
  44. Let them pick up the tab.
  45. Accept the compliment. Simply say, thank you.
  46. Delete negative accounts from your social media feed.
  47. Choose to be happy.
  48. Stand up straight.
  49. Unsubscribe from email lists that don’t serve you.
  50. Look yourself in the eye and remind yourself that you are beautiful and you are worthy.


One of the best ways we can serve the people we love is to take care of ourselves first. By setting clear boundaries, we protect our energy. By setting a good example of self-care, we teach those around us how to take care of themselves.


What are some ways you practice self-care? Join in the conversation and post them below.